The Search That Never Ends
Finding balance has been a real struggle as of late. I have had to stop and evaluate some things. This is what I came up with. I thought I would share in case someone else out there is feeling all high wind cycloney like me.
I have three major roles in my life at this point. All of them having moving parts and need to be reevaluated regularly. So, what are the three major roles in my life?
First, I am a woman. What does that mean to me? The list can be quite extensive but here is my condensed version.
Woman = a dreamer, lover of art, deep thoughts, food, friendship, interior design, music, and travel.
If I were to focus solely on being a woman I could become self centered, leaving my husband and son to possibly feel unimportant and neglected. Not balanced.
Second, I chose to become a wife. What does that mean to me?
Wife = best friend, cheerleader, lover, partner, support
Ok. If I focus all my energy on being a wife I could end up suffering an identity crisis. If I don't know who I am, how could I expect my husband to know who I am and what makes me... me? My son could feel like an after thought, misplaced and inconvenient. Not balanced.
Third, I became a mother. What does that mean to me?
Mother = a cheerleader, comforter, disciplinarian, play mate, support, teacher
If I concentrate exclusively on being a mother I can feel drained and unfulfilled. Possibly, even abandoned when my son grows up and leaves the nest. He could end up self centered with a false sense of entitlement. My husband could feel left out and alone. Not balanced.
So, what's a girl to do? Try to put a little energy in each role every single day.
That's my goal. Do a little of what makes me the woman I am and hope to be. Do a little of what makes me the wife I am happy to be and want to continue to grow as. Do a little of what makes me the mother my little guy needs every day.
It seems so simple, but the way life challenges us, no matter what your roles happen to be, it is way too easy to get lost in an unbalanced vortex. Sometimes, you just have to stop spinning, stop reacting, and figure out what role is getting too much and which one isn't getting enough.
So, every night in my journal I write at least one thing I did in each of my roles. It's helping. ... the over thinker in me however, starts to contemplate the many sub roles I play. If I included them I would be thinking and writing all night! Which would exhaust me and make fulfilling my roles of wife and mother the next day extra challenging, leaving me to feel ... off balanced. See where I'm going with this?!
What are some ways you find balance?